Whether you are becoming an empty nester, considering retirement or even moving to a new town or new house, there is one thing that will help your marriage make the transition. It is ACCEPTANCE! Yes, very same thing that is what I notice coaching those who consider themselves “happy” in their marriages as opposed to those who come to me wanting to solve their marriage problems.
What I mean by acceptance is “allowing” your spouse to behave however they want. I put the word allow in quotes because in reality, it is impossible for you to control the behavior of adult human beings. But just think about it–other people typically do what they want anyhow, and even if you try to use emotional manipulation to try to control them, they might do or say what you want them to, but they sure aren’t going to do it without a healthy dose of bitterness or resentment.
What if when you are embarking on a new phase in life, trying to navigate new waters with your spouse, you could talk and react in a way that no matter what they said or did you had no demands, you didn’t make their behaviors mean anything about YOU, and you could just LOVE them? Think about it. Think HARD. Try it out–acceptance could be the difference between moving ahead into unknown territory as a true partnership.